dreamy

It feels like I’ve time traveled and landed in a parallel universe.
I’m numb and in awe.

It’s you, but it’s not you.
Like I’m in a dream.

You’re picking me up in an 80’s Cadillac, no seat belt. Holding the door like a gentleman.
The speedometer trembling to keep up. A dream catcher hanging from your windshield mirror. The lights on the road, purple. It’s as if I’m in a film. I’m again reminded of the magic. The moments of whimsey my heart lives for. The words coming out of your mouth; strangely familiar. Like you traveled from another timeline, except it’s not really you. Just the semblance.

Today you put a watch on my wrist. Like he put a bracelet. It’s like I was re-living the past in a warped reality where time was outside of time. As if dimensions had been collapsed together and I’ve been brought back here with you, except it’s not you. We drove past a store with his name written on it. What? His name.But not him. You. This moment, this car…

“Am I dreaming?”

Some moments in life are so unpredictable. So magical. It reminds me what I live for.

One moment we’re exchanging glances. The next we’re kissing in your bedroom in the dark.

—

On the surface I’m ok, but underneath there is a volcano.

I’m afraid of closeness. Like once you know me it won’t be the same.
And vice versa. Once I know you, maybe it won’t be the same.

—

The roads here make me nostalgic. If there is one word that captures the timbre of my soul, that one is probably it.

Anyway, this weird abstract message is all I have for today. It’s all been so weird lately.

—

I think I want a husband.

The dream feels so much better than the reality.

And as a dreamer, I just want to live in the fantasy.

I want to live in the Ether.
I want to be in the lightwave.

This morning I was walking the neighborhood towards the beach,

The temperature felt perfect.

The air felt sweet and filled deeply in my lungs.
I felt a juicy sense of peace.

“This.” I thought. This is how we are meant to be feeling.

Not rushing around trying to make ends meet.

Not feeling like we are worried about resources,
afraid we won’t have money.

We are meant to be LIVING.
We are meant to be provided for because the Earth already provides all we need.

The Earth grows our food freely.
The Earth grows the resources we need for our homes.

The Earth gave us the animals,
it gave us EACH OTHER.

We should be caring for each other.
Working as a way to contribute to our well-being and good.

WTF is all this extra non-sense?

I’m not having it.

We can be so dulled down by the way society has beaten us into a reality we may not be that excited to wake up to.

We are doing it.

We should live with deep sighs of relief. With peace in our hearts. With health pulsating through our bodies. Yet we are tense, afraid, rushing, stressed. WTF is that about?

We should have time for each other. Time for our babies. Time for simply living. Our energy is so poorly allocated. We are working to raise money to pay rent which is a never ending cycle when the Earth has already provided the materials but capitalism won’t stop running you down. It infuriates me.

I know something is off here. And I am going to do something about it. Even if it’s just write you this message. “Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much.”

Tag

dreamy

Nostalgia

Dream Vs Reality