paradox

Where

Where do I start?
I suppose we can run down the usual…

What are we doing?

As a species we are still very immature. We compete, get jealous, operate from ego, show off, get easily upset, think the world needs to cater to our feelings and preferences.

I am also human. Guilty of some of the very same sins I go on about.

I sometimes watch myself do what is wrong, like throw away the recycling into the trash bin. Small little things, wrong nonetheless.

I don’t want to go on and on about it, but watching our silly foolishness just grinds my gears. There is so much I wish to say but it’s hard to put into words. It’s one of those days I wish to tell you everything but all I can muster is whatever this is.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times” to quote Dickens and sum some of it up.

I am feeling the ache and the awe. The grief and the gladness.
All the in betweens. Simultaneously at once.

We think the answer is outside, yet the answer is within.

—

Anyway,
my neighbor is so hot

I wish that he would kiss me.

June 22, 2025 0

Duality

Lately I’ve been swimming in duality pretty hard core.
Holding the full weight of the paradox in my nervous system.

Life and death.
Everything and nothing.
Loving you and hating you.
Holding on and letting go.

I must be able to do both.

I am sitting with complexity. With nuance. Learning to be soft and strong. Open and discerning. Hopeful and wise.

I’ve been naive and delusional. There’s a part of me that still is because deep down I still believe in the magical. In the miracle. In the mystical.

There is this new part that is coming through now. A sage. A mothering spirit. A fierce protector. A guard. A part who is more selective. A part who is more refined. A part who knows how to say “no.” A part who can speak up. A part who is grounded. A part who is solid.

Yet in all of that, still holding this full surrendered letting go. Knowing all too well nothing is guaranteed – not even the next moment. I used to believe my dreams would certainly come to pass. Now, I still believe they will but with the awareness they are not guarantees. It’s all subject to change.

I sit with trust and surrender. I sit with hope and detachment. I sit with anger and understanding. With sadness and awe. With hate and with love. I sit with all of it. It’s like I’ve swallowed the universe whole and it’s ripping through my throat as it goes down past my chest taking bits of me and it sits in my tummy. It’s a painful digest. It’s a painful release. And a beautiful, glorious transformation.

March 27, 2025 0

The time is now

To love
To swim in the ocean
To get the back tattoo your mother told you not to
To feel the wind on your skin
To look up at the moon and howl like a wolf
To say “I’m sorry”
To say “I love you”
To laugh
To dance without caring what anybody else thinks
To bake cookies and offer it to your neighbors
To call your daughter
To write the book
To book a one way flight to London
To release the past
To paint
To kiss
To just fucking LIVE

We’re on a “planet” (this is what we call it, whatever “it” is this is) traversing through space at insane speed, with intelligent bodies and food just growing off the land so we could eat it… like c’mon on.. WTF is going on?

You better start acting like this is magical and CARPE THAT DIEM
There might as well be unicorns riding on leprechauns while doing back flips and eating donuts because none of this makes sense

I am literally typing on a “computer” with intelligent hands who respond to an intelligent brain and then fucking sending this out into the ethers so your intelligent, magnificent eye could read it. LIKE WTF?

If you’re not just losing your shit 24/7 at this marvel, I dunno what else needs to happen for you to awaken to the magic waiting for you to behold it

Ahhhh

The time is fucking NOW

To rise up

and be the most amazing you, you could be

If this was a symphony we’re about to hit the climatic moment

A kaleidoscope of flavors, colors, sounds, tongues

HEARTS ARE OPEN

I am ready to receive

I am ready to give

To surrender to life
While also standing true to that which I am

Neither this nor that
Neither here nor there
Neither this or that

Nothing – Something – Paradox
Folding unto itself in the hopes of squeezing out something…..

Could we finally look into each other’s soul and admit the full truth?
Could we look in each other’s eyes and finally know?

I don’t know

But I think it’s time we at least fucking try

Tag

paradox

Where

Duality

Time