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Reflect Out Loud

"The unexamined life is not worth living." – Socrates

Tag

unconscious

Information Overload

There’s just so much shit out there it’s hard to keep up. A lot of information, and some of it contradictory. Who do you believe? Who do you follow? Who really has the answers?

 

So much is subjective, dependent, contingent.

 

I sometimes find myself paralyzed by it all. I just want to pull the sheet over my head and say “Good night,” without ever having to wake up. Without having to come back to waking consciousness to deal with any of it.

Why do I have to be here? To participate? I don’t want any part. I don’t want to have to do things. Think. Figure out. Experience.

I’m good with just the black screen. With no sensory input. With no consciousness. With no awareness.

That, to me, is real peace.

 

 

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Hurt

I’ve been so hurt before.

And I could point at the world and say “You. It’s your fault.”

I could point at life and say “You. It’s your fault.”

Or I could point at me and say “Me. It’s my fault. For not being mature enough. For letting my emotions rule me. For allowing such things as ego to run me. For allowing my attachments to get the best of me. For not knowing how to let go. For not knowing how to surrender. To be okay in the face of what is. To accept that not everything goes my way. And that there are things that I don’t like. And if I can help them, great. And if not, it’s okay.”

I don’t know. I’m still trying to figure it out.

All I know is that I want to heal. And I want not to be ruled by my emotions. Especially not the destructive ones. I want to live awake. Live consciously. But most of all, live happily, freely, abundantly, peacefully, connctectedly and in love.

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