I feel like I’m caught in this weird limbo where I’m not too old school and I’m not too new school.
I’m some mixture of rotary phones, AOL, Spice Girls, Backstreet boys and when Snicker bars were still 50 cents type era combined with some of today’s millennial spice.
What the fuck am I going to do with my life? That’s my current meditation.
I came out to Cali for the weather… and yeah it’s been pretty nice… but it could be better.
I keep looking at Florida weather and it’s looking really nice right now.
I am a 75 degrees and sunny typa gal.
I like to feel the sun on my skin.
I can’t stand the cold.
I’m liking the properties out in Texas.
Big. Modern. Luxury. CHEAP.
But at night it’s looking pretty cold. And I hear summers are brutal.
I want warm, beautiful, and cheap.
On a side note. Fuck my job.
Working 40+ hours a week doing a job that I hate IS NOT how I’m going to write my story. I can’t do it, man. Shoot me in the face if that’s how it’s going to be.
“It’s only temporary” is the mantra that’s getting me through.
I like to drink coffee throughout the day. It’s my addiction.
I’m also addicted to thinking about the past. And the future. And imagined scenarios in my head.
I’m looking for new apartments in San Diego.
But I’m trying to find what is worth me staying here… because so far I don’t see much. I can get warmth in Florida, plus cheaper property – so what the fuck am I gonna stay here for?
I came here for the warmth. And it’s not even that warm right now.
It’s not New York City cold, not even close – but it hasn’t been as warm and sunny on most days right now either.
Greg. That is one of my reasons to stay.
My goal is to find a place I am fairly happy with and give Cali a fair shot.
I’m still trying to figure it all out.
I haven’t written a poem in a very long time.
But here are these vague ramblings…
My complaints. My humanness.
My less than glamorous thoughts out loud for you to see.