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Live Fearlessly

You are enough, valid, and fearless. Live it!

The external world can be an intimidating place.
We are constantly bombarded with information that tells us how to behave, what is appropriate, what is beautiful, what is acceptable and so on. When we live by comparing ourselves to others and comparing ourselves to the general understanding of what is “right” and “proper” we lose the chance to be who we really are. We start to embrace the world view of others and behave in accordance to what may earn us respect, love and acceptance.

This is where self love and self acceptance comes in. When you begin to validate yourself for who you are without comparing or basing your self-worth on external and unrealistic ideals, you finally realize the freedom and power you really have. You start to live from a place of fearlessness and embody confidence that radiates from the inside out. You learn that so long as you approve of yourself, it is not necessary to seek validation from others. You begin to trust yourself and realize how valid your sense of being actually is! You no longer need to act like somebody you are not simply because doing so may get you the approval of some. Approve of yourself! Listen to your heart and follow it without being afraid of what others may think.
Sooner or later you realize that when you live authentically, the right people will be drawn to you. You will start doing what you love simply because you love to do it and not because you want others to give you a tap on your shoulder.

Be free to be who you are without fear of judgment. No matter what you do or don’t do people will judge anyway. For this reason, it is important to be your own judge and to love yourself unconditionally. Love yourself with all your flaws and all your imperfections. Love all your good and all your “bad.” You are an entire package and every aspect of you is here to be shared and explored!

Next time you feel a strong urge to reach out to someone or say something bold, don’t hold yourself back or judge yourself harshly – be free to express yourself.
You don’t have to worry about who is judging you negatively because you already approve of yourself.

You rock! Remember that! Always.

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Dance With Your Life

“Everything – the good and bad, pleasure and pain, approval and disapproval, achievements and mistakes, fame and shame – all come and go. Everything has a beginning and an ending and that’s the way it’s supposed to be.” – Richard Carlson

Life can be so unpredictable. One moment you are sitting there smiling, sipping some coffee – the next you’re in tears because of unexpected events beyond your control.

We cannot control what happens outside of us. A plate breaks, someone yells at you in traffic, a woman cuts you in line at the grocery store, your company downsizes and you are cut from the team, the kids are in trouble at school, there is a sickness in the family, the list is endless. Nevertheless, you can control how you react to your external circumstances.

When you live your life from the inside out, you finally come to a place where you always have control. You always have a choice when it comes to your internal feelings about the chaos going on all around you. Life will hand you curve balls. Inevitably, something will eventually go wrong, and it is at this moment where you can breathe and tell yourself “I am in control of how I respond and of how feel about this situation.” You can think to yourself, “Will I react by feeling defeated, angry, and upset? Or will I let go, breathe and invite peace into my heart as I take deliberate, intuitive steps to bring myself out of this situation?” You always have the power to choose the latter. You do not have to choose to feel bad when the car breaks down or when you lose your job or whatever other difficulty. It may not be easy at first to realize that you have the power within you to switch from painful reactions to peaceful ones. But with practice and awareness you will come to see that you do have a choice as to what you harbor in your internal space and how you will react to your external world.

Life will always hand us troubles and because of this it is important to become a peaceful warrior. Challenges are opportunities for our growth. We learn from our mistakes and from our difficult circumstances. We learn to let go and realize that when one door closes it also opens new doors of opportunities. One day, we will all eventually let go of everything – this is called death – the total letting go of all. So why not practice now? Let go of painful reactions and embrace peaceful responses that allow you to dance with the unexpected maneuvers of life rather than battle with them only to bring yourself more pain. Dance with your life!

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Start Where You Are

If you are anything like me, then you already want to be at the finish line when you haven’t even started the race.

There are moments in my life where I feel stuck because I haven’t yet completed my goals – or even worse, I haven’t even started. I feel like I am getting older and have no time to achieve anything because I should already have started, I should already have finished. Thinking that I am “too old” to start has limited me time and time again. It has made me unable to commit to anything meaningful to me because I feel like I should already be at the end, not at the beginning. I keep thinking that I should already have “arrived” where I want to be in my professional life, and because I should already have arrived, then it’s too late to start. I realize, however, that this sort of belief is extremely limiting to me and keeps me from making real moves towards what I would like to accomplish.

The truth is that there is no wrong time to start. There is only here and now, and that is always an enough of a place to begin anything. As long as I am alive, I can move in the direction I wish – even if it takes tiny steps. Tiny steps in the right direction lead to large shifts over time.
So the best place to start is right where I am, as I am.

I realize that beating myself up for not being where I want to be does not serve my best interest. In fact, it only helps to sink me further into non-action and makes me feel horrible about myself.
If I want to lose 10 pounds, for instance, beating myself up for not already being 10 pounds lighter does not serve me in any positive way, it only discourages me. I must simply acknowledge where I am and from here, take steps to where I want to be without calling myself “a lazy fat-ass” in the process. Calling myself mean names and telling myself I am lazy, isn’t helping me. It isn’t making me feel any better and it isn’t motivating me to achieve my goal. Rather than being mean to myself I can, instead, tell myself “I acknowledge that I haven’t been very active, but that’s okay because starting NOW, I am active.”

Whatever change we wish to make in our lives is possible. Whatever you were doing yesterday, whether it be committing to the wrong career, relationship or diet, starting today you can move into the direction of where you actually want to be. You can start making changes today without beating yourself up for yesterday. Yesterday is gone, today – NOW, offers you new opportunities to begin a path that is in line with what you truly wish to achieve. If you are reading this, then you are alive – and as long as you are alive then there is still time for you to move towards your goals. Start where you are and with what you have. I know that it is tempting to want to be at the finish line – and you will be – as long as you start just as you are, today.

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The “Word” of God is Not Limited to The Bible

Disclaimer: Dear reader, this post is coming from the most genuine place of my heart and has zero intention of denying anyone’s knowledge, but rather including everyone’s knowledge to produce harmony by way of unity.

Believing that the Bible is the full and complete word of God is very limiting. First, because the word of God is so infinitely and immeasurably grand that a book is insufficient to contain it. Secondly, because words are extremely limiting and not adequate basis with which to measure the fullness of God.

Everything that IS, is the “word” of God.
The “word” of God isn’t even words to begin with, though it may in part be experienced through words.

To conceive of God through the notions of one book alone means to limit God. To understand more of God we must be able to allow ALL forms of information and knowledge to pass through our consciousness.

When we open a Biology book and we begin to learn about cells, organisms, life, the human body, among other biological aspects, for instance, we are coming into contact with more of the word of God. When we read a chemistry book and we learn about molecules, atoms, elements, chemicals – we are learning more of the word of God.

How do you know when the water has boiled and at what temperature? The Bible does not tell us – but a science book does. And a science book, too, is the word of God.

When we learn about technology and how planes fly, how cars move, how our cellphones operate – the Bible will not tell us this – but a mechanics, physics, and technology book can.  And this too, is the word of God.

How does the optometrist know how to perform laser surgery to restore eye sight? Does he read the Bible to figure it out? No. He reads books on the subject matter of eye surgery. This, too, is the word of God.

When you put together your Ikea furniture, do you read the Bible or the manual? You read the manual. This, too, is the word of God.

ALL information – past, present, future is the word of God. There is nothing that exists outside of the “word” of God. ALL THAT IS IS THE WORD OF GOD.

We must not exclude anything because to exclude any one thing is to limit the unlimited. The unlimited contains EVERYTHING. So to take only one tiny book and claim that it alone is the word of God is EXTREMELY limiting and I urge you to open your understanding and come to see that God is not limited by books. God is not limited by words.

Words are just sounds we make with our mouths as so to communicate ideas which we have formulated by way of experience. We must use the words as pointers for our expansion, not limits that constrain our growth and hinder our full understanding of the universe.

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THE PROCESS OF BECOMING

Who are you?
Answer: ___________________________

You might answer this question by telling me your name. Your age, cultural background, your social security number, and yada, yada, yada.

But see – that’s not really who you are. That’s information you have acquired from what the external world has determined for you.
You are the awareness of these things.
You are not your name, you are the awareness of your name.
You are not your age, you are the awareness of your age.
You are not your cultural background, you are the awareness of your cultural background.

Get the drift? I hope so.

“So what? So what if I am the awareness of that stuff?”

YAY! Great news, my friend!
Being awareness means that you get to choose your own reality!
It is up to YOU to decide what to accept or reject into your field of awareness.

So the process of becoming is simply asking yourself what are you aware of.
What thoughts are you aware of? Your own? Those imposed on you by others? A little bit of both?

If you realize that you have adopted the thoughts of others rather than your own, this isn’t a bad thing. It isn’t a good thing either. It just IS. This is how we grow – by exchanging ideas with one another.

Things are what they are – things ARE. PERIOD. Whether something is good or bad depends on the preference of the aware being.

So, for instance, the experience of eating chocolate ice cream may be good for me because to my awareness I experience something good from eating it. Someone else, however, may be eating from my chocolate ice cream cup yet have a distasteful experience because to their awareness they experience something bad from eating chocolate ice cream. There is nothing in the particles of chocolate ice cream itself that is coded with “goodness” or “badness” – these types of labeling are judgements of the experiencer based on the effect a particular thing has in combination to their particular being – to their awareness.

So what am I ultimately saying?
– Become YOU.

Do you like chocolate ice cream because YOU like chocolate ice cream or have you come to like chocolate ice cream because people might think you are cool if you eat chocolate ice cream?

Or fill it in this blank:
Do you like ___________ because YOU like _________ or do you like___________ because you believe X person(s) want you to like ___________?

Are you YOU because YOU take pleasure in who you are or are you YOU because of what you believe other people want you to be?
And maybe it’s a combination of both.
It isn’t bad to tag along with what others think is cool – that’s fine – we have words for that: admiration, inspiration, sharing, absorption, learning.
It only becomes a problem when you are not happy with yourself because you are not being true to who you are but are living a life that is decorated by what others want you to be.

When we seek to be what others want us to be, we are seeking approval.
We are seeking approval from others because we have failed to approve of ourselves just as we are. Somewhere along the way we adopted the awareness that “the way I am, as I am, is not good enough.”

Not good enough to whose awareness?

See, as long as to YOUR awareness you are enough, then no matter who tells you “YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH,” this statement will fall flat on its feet – it will have no power over you. It would be the same as a person telling me over and over “chocolate ice cream sucks.” This statement has no power over me because to MY awareness – CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM FUCKING ROCKS!

Be YOU Because YOU like it – whatever it is that you are. And if others like you too – AWESOME – if not, who cares? NOT YOU is all that matters. It is not for their awareness to decide what YOUR AWARENESS KNOWS TO BE TRUE FOR YOU.

YOUR AWARENESS IS ALL THE MATTERS.

Become YOU.
🙂 ❤

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John

I will tell you about John.

John is a good guy. He walks around trying to do the “right thing.” He smiles at people hoping people will smile back. He yearns to connect; he yearns to be accepted and to accept back.

John loves all people. Even people with three or four heads and eyes. Even purple people, blue people, orange people and invisible people.
John is very curious.
John is scared sometimes because he doesn’t like pain. But he does like it when the nurse comes along and rubs alcohol on his boo-boo. It makes him feel loved. Like someone cares about his well-being.

John likes to play. He wishes he could play all day. He wishes he could climb trees and pretend he is a pirate looking out into the ocean for some loot and new found land.
But there is a thing called “job” he has to do.
John doesn’t necessarily dislike the idea of a job – he understands how important functions are to a well operating society. What John doesn’t like is when he is forced to play roles he doesn’t feel comfortable playing.

John wants to walk around the world and give everyone little paper hearts because he wants people to remember how to love.
John wants people to know how to see not just with the eyes, but with their whole entire being.

John gets angry sometimes. He gets angry when the world expects him to be more than what he already is. It is not that John doesn’t want to be more – or “expand” as he would call it, it’s that John wants the freedom to grow at his own pace.

John doesn’t like when he is corrected in a condescending way.
John wants to be the best John he can be and wants to be spoken to in a loving manner, not in a punishing manner.

John is tired now.

I will share more about him another day.

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Trust Yourself

There are so many people out there saying so many different things that it can become really overwhelming sometimes. One particular type of statement that really gets on my nerves is the one that sounds something like: “It’s not this, but THIS.” The problem with this kind of statement is that sooner or later someone else will just say the exact opposite: “No, It’s not ‘THIS,’ but THAT!”
People will always have something to say about life and how it should or shouldn’t be, but at the end of the day it’s not their place to tell you what you should do or how you should live.
Only you have the power to decide what to do with your life and in which direction to stir it.

Instead of asking what others want from you or what they think you should do, start consulting your own being. Next time you get an urge to ask your friends what they think you should do, stop for a moment and look inside yourself and ask your very own self: “Hey, [speak your name], do you think I should do this?” Start to look within your own self and trust your decisions. Everyone has an opinion, and YOUR opinion is just as valid.

Trust your intuition. Trust the feelings that are guiding you. Let your own person shine. Let your ideas flow. Stop worrying about earning the approval of others and begin to approve yourself.

Every day tell yourself these words:
I am enough.
I approve myself.
I accept myself as I am.
I am capable of making my own choices.
I trust my own being.
I believe in myself.
I believe I will succeed.

Let your own voice be heard. Free yourself from needing the validation of others and start looking to yourself for validation. It can be tempting to want others to pat our backs so that we can feel we are accepted and belong, but once you start to accept yourself it will not matter who is for or against you because you will have everything you need – YOU.

Only YOU can walk your path and only YOU are living your life.
Your life does not belong to your friends.
Your life does not belong to your family.
Your life belongs to YOU – and YOU are the author of your story.
Be free to live your life according to your liking without fear of the judgement of others.
As long as you are not hurting yourself or others, there is no reason to be afraid of being yourself.
YOU ARE FREE TO BE YOU!

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Finding Purpose in the Little-Big Things

Sometimes I get down on myself because of where I am in life. I get stuck thinking that I should be doing more, accomplishing more, believing that through my accomplishments I will be finally fulfilled. I keep thinking that once I have a high paying job, a nice house, a nice car, a couple of degrees on my wall then I could look at all the things I’ve achieved and say “OK. You did it. Your life is now perfect.”

Where did I get this idea? Why do I think that fulfillment comes from external accomplishments?
I mean, sure externals can bring fulfillment, but if you’re like me struggling and straining through the externals in hope that your strain will later bring fulfillment – then maybe we need to refocus ourselves.

I keep thinking I need to achieve some big thing so I can prove to myself and the world that I matter.
But today I woke up with the realization that I don’t need to do anything in order to matter. I already matter simply because I exist.

I realize that I need to appreciate the little things and that these little things are really big things in and of themselves. I was wallowing around thinking I have no purpose because I work a “meaningless job” at a storage company. Then I realized “Hey, wait a minute. I do have a purpose. I am the storage girl. My purpose right now is to be the best storage girl I can be. My purpose is to smile and give good service to my customers and to make sure that everyone who comes in looking for a place to keep their stuff is helped in a warm and friendly manner. I am the storage girl for now and this is my purpose right now.”

I was undermining myself simply because I didn’t feel like my job was meaningful. But it is. Even if I was flipping burgers at McDonald’s, that is meaningful too. If flipping burgers is my job, I simply need to know that for now my purpose is to be the best burger flipper I can be! Or if I am a cleaning lady, my purpose right now is to just be the best cleaning lady I can be.

I realize now that no matter what position I am in, whether it is president or servant, I have a purpose to fulfill in my particular place in time. I need to know that my purpose right now is whatever that purpose is right now and that I am not less than anyone else simply because of the title I hold.

I realize also that I have a tendency to compare myself to others making me feel inferior because I believe I should also be doing what others are doing. I need to understand that I am ME and not OTHERS. And that whatever I do in time is just as meaningful as what other people are doing because in the grand scheme of things we are all operating for some greater purpose – to move forward in time.

I need to improve my faith. I need to learn to trust that tomorrow will be ok and that I will be provided for. I don’t need to work-out the future, I just need to be here right now fulfilling this very purpose in time. I need to understand that my worth is not defined by my accomplishments even though that’s what our society often wants us to believe. This kind of mentality only serves to discourage us when in truth we are all the same.

Ultimately, what I am saying is: This moment, right here, right now – this is my life. My life is not in some future place or in the past. My life is here and being here is my purpose. I don’t need to feel like I must accomplish some great thing in the future in order to feel great. I am great because I exist. Life has chosen me to come to be and to be is my primary purpose. What I do at any point in time is big. Just coming in to my job and helping people get their storage room is big. Life has all these little moments that make big things. Let’s marvel in the little-big things of every day life.

Just relax in this moment.
Let yourself know that this moment is enough.
Let yourself know that tomorrow will be ok.
Let yourself be here and now.
Whatever action needs to be taken in this moment, take it.
If no action needs to be taken, just be.
You don’t need to plan your whole life.
You don’t need to compare yourself to others.
You are enough just as you are in this moment.
Your presence is a big accomplishment in and of itself.
Marvel in the little-big things.
Your purpose is to be and that is very, very big.

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Becoming who I am

You’d think it would be easy to be who you really are — but now I realize that it is necessary to assess my own thoughts in order to see which are truly mine and which have been implanted in me by others.

My mother had many fears and many thoughts about the world which she transferred over to me.
“You can’t have sex before marriage, it’s sinful.”
“You have to let your hair grow long because short hair is not desirable.”
“You can’t braid your hair, braids will ruin your hair.”
“You can’t talk to strangers because they will hurt you.”

I understand that her intention was to protect me – she wanted to shelter me from her fears and thoughts about the world.

My mother is not the only one who implanted ideas into my mind. Commercials, movies, stories, books, opinions of others and anything else external to me has had an impact on how I see the world. The outside is dictating how I should see the world suffocating my own ability to think and create for myself.

The point I am making isn’t that we shouldn’t listen to what is outside of us – the point I am making is that we are free to choose what is and isn’t true for ourselves. No one has the power to tell you what and who you are without your own consent.

If I take in the idea “Don’t cut your hair because short hair is undesirable” I limit myself to this idea – which isn’t really true unless I believe it to be so. There are plenty of gorgeous people with short hair – why am I going to limit myself to my mother’s fears of short hair?

I must see that I have the power to decipher what is really true for me.
I must not live by the fears and ideas of others.
I must have my own ideas. I must see the world for myself and through my own eyes, not the eyes of others. This does not mean that others are “wrong” and I am “right” or vice-versa – it’s not about that; it’s about acknowledging and respecting the perspective of others but not losing myself in their picture of the world. I must be able to choose whether or not I think this is really true for me or am I just simply living to impress others.

Am I going with the flow because I believe the flow is suitable for me or am I going with the flow because I am too afraid to swim against the flow? I must not be afraid to swim alone if I have to.
It’s better to be in the pool alone but completely happy than to be in a crowded pool pretending to be happy.

I must not be afraid to become who I am – and I am whoever I want to be.
If I want to have short hair, I must not be afraid to cut my hair because of the beliefs of my mother.
If I want to sell my possessions and go explore the Earth – I must not be afraid to go seek out my wishes simply because others deem it dangerous or unfitting to the norms of society.

I must realize that this is MY LIFE.
MY LIFE GOES ACCORDING TO MY VIEW.

MY LIFE IS MINE.

MY LIFE IS MY OWN. I GET TO SAY HOW I WILL LIVE IT.
I APPRECIATE GOOD ADVICE BUT IN THE END IT IS STILL MY LIFE – IT IS MY STORY TO WRITE.

This is YOUR STORY. Your story is written by you, no one else. You can go with the flow of others but you will always feel like something is missing because you are suffocating your own will to please the crowd.

Don’t suffocate your will for the will of others, unless that is your true will. 

KNOW YOUR WILL!

Are you willing something because it was implanted in you – or are you willing something because deep down it is your own true will? FREE WILL COMES WHEN YOU CHOOSE ACCORDING TO YOUR OWN UNIQUE WILL – NOT IN ACCORDANCE TO THE WORLD BUT IN ACCORDANCE TO YOUR FREE WILL.

If I clean my room for the sake of impressing my guests, am I free? If deep down I just want to be lazy and not clean anything – why am I cleaning? So that I could please others and live in accordance to the will of those who say “you must clean your room to impress your guests.”

BE IMPRESSED BY LIFE ITSELF NOT BY A CLEAN OR UNCLEAN ROOM.

If you clean – clean because you want to.
If you dance – dance because you want to.
If you grow your hair – grow it because you want to.

CHOOSE! BECOME YOU – NOT WHO THE WORLD WANTS YOU TO BE.
BE LOVED FOR WHO YOU TRULY ARE WITHOUT HOLDING UP TO THE STANDARDS OF OTHERS.

BE AS YOU WISH TO BE SO THAT THOSE WHO TRULY LOVE YOU WILL LOVE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE AND NOT FOR WHO YOU HAVE TO BE IN ORDER THAT YOU MAY BE ACCEPTED.

I am also not saying – go do anything you want like kill or rape. If you don’t want your will to be compromised, don’t compromise the will of others either. We must respect all free will. We must respect all of humanity in the process of becoming who we really are.

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