I’ve been practicing this new way of being. I am not attaching to my thoughts as often as I used to be, especially not the negative ones.
My mind is usually going on and on about anything and everything. Analyzing, criticizing, fantasizing all kinds of scenarios, breaking things apart, putting them back together, accessing memories from years back and entertaining ideas about their meanings, projecting myself into the future, rubik’s cubing all the possible scenarios to manipulate outcomes, interpreting external cues and data, attempting to make sense of it all, wondering if I’m being perceived okay and if I fit in or not, worrying about rejection and doom, catastrophizing, rationalizing, compartimentalizing, all over the placealizing, and boy, let me tell you, it’s exhausting!!!
I have to LET THIS WAY OF BEING GO!
I don’t live in real time when I live like this. I live in the mind. Lost in a story. Lost in thoughts that are usually negative.
No. No. No. No more!
I want to simply exist. Let whatever thoughts cross my mind but not latch on to them like they’re reality. They’re just thoughts. They are NOT TRUTH.
I don’t have to entertain whatever chatter pops up in my head. Ideas have no power over me unless I start to entertain, accept, attach and believe them. Fuck that noise.
I want to live HERE and PRESENT. Not in some limiting bullshit ass story that is running in my mind.
Nope. Unsubscribe from that party!
I’m not yet fully versed in this new way of being yet, though. I’m a newbie at it.
But even as a newbie it’s helping me so much already. I am working on my mental health like I am working on my physical health. My mind is a muscle that I can train just like I can train my body. And I want to train it to serve me, rather than be a servant to it’s loose ramblings.
Wish me luck! And good luck to those of you out there practicing the same. You’re a badass and I love you!
August 26, 2018 at 12:46 am
No bae, you’re badass and we love you!